Baldur can’t understand why the women in Asgard look nothing like those on Midgard.

Loki explains:

The women in Asgard are covered up with so much armor and weaponry that there’s no telling what lies beneath. Those that are willing to depart with their shells are frequently in dire shape from tussles with giants, dragons, and enemy clans. Add to this the generally cold northern climate and you have a prescription for total female disaster.

Yeah, I know this comic is a little sick. Welcome to my twisted brain. At least I know — like the Norse gods — that I won’t have to live with myself forever. Even the afterlife is temporary. This comic is a little misinformed as well. Everyone knows there are plenty of smoking hot Valkyries in Asgard. Unfortunately, I don’t currently have the illustration skills to create them for the electronic pages of Odin and Friends!