Odin realizes that not every man was born a poet. That some of us jumble our words and can’t figure out whether the word for strange is spelled “weird,” “wierd”, or “wyrd.” That most of us don’t prance around talking to the heavens all day but only when our head is on the block.

So when you do manage to cough out a prayer, don’t make the mistake of this bold knight and just recycle the one from Conan the Barbarian. Yes, the Conan Prayer is a beautiful little piece of work, but consider this:

– The prayer was intended for Crom, not Odin.

– The prayer was uttered by the body building governor of California. I’m with you, I wish the movie was real too, but we have to be honest about such things.

– Odin is the God of Poetry not the God of Movie Quotations and Arnold Impersonations.

Am I wrong on this one? You guys tell me.

For those of you unfamiliar with the Conan Prayer (infidels!), there’s a refresher below. No, the guy below is not me, but he has obviously seen the Greatest Movie Ever Made as many times as I have: